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You forgot Garlic Day, and now I’m drunk

Idolizing the normies

So you’re moving out of an apartment you ruined

Columnist watching Walking Dead finale instead of writing…

I think I’m the only person who’s stoned in this art…

A bicycle won’t get you laid, fool

It’s still winter and everything is crappy

Dunkin’ Donuts!

You guys! Michelle Obama redecorated the White House dining…

How to treat your sweetie snookums on Valentine’s Day!

So it’s four days after the Super Bowl and you still have a…

Sam Cook detained after office burglary

Please don’t judge me based on my alcoholic dog

Man thought to be missing found not dead

Gift ideas for your mail carrier

Resolutions are for people who admit to having flaws

We are all apathetic, blithering idiots

So you invited someone who hates people to your holiday…

And Santa sighed loudly and updated his LinkedIn profile

It’s Goober Friday

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