With the current flood of right wing idiots, conspiracy theorists, and religious nuts infesting our body politic, it is really difficult to write satirical pieces for April Fools Day. Reality is just too bizarre and the daily headlines are laughable as reported. It is difficult to spoof these clowns.

These people need to heed the advise of Mark Twain, “It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.” There is no doubt America today is infested with fools and many of them won't stop proving it.

Here are some examples of right wing foolish demagoguery and electile dysfunction.

Making up you own language

The latest idiocy is the perverting of the word “woke” (past tense of wake, as in “I woke up this morning”). In recent years it has taken on new meaning. The online Cambridge Dictionary defines woke as “aware, especially of social problems such as racism and inequality.” The Urban Dictionary defines the word as “Spiritual and intellectual enlightenment, like waking up from a deep sleep and seeing things clearly for the first time.”

What is wrong with being awake and aware of that is really happening in our society? One would hope everyone would be aware of reality. But right wing demagogues have turned this positive word (like they did with “liberal”) into a derogatory term of hate and division for anything and anybody with which they disagree.

Tiffany Tomfoolery

Wisconsin Congressman Tom Tiffany is master of foolish rantings about “woke,” socialism, the wonders of the free market, Biden, Democrats in general, or anything more progressive than the Robber Barons. He is a master of misleading misinformation that sounds good to the uninformed but will be very destructive to the people of northern Wisconsin if implemented.

In his March 17 newsletter he describes “the far left’s goal of turning America into a woke utopia that prioritizes environmental, social, governance (ESG) above all else.” One would think good environmental and social polices and some good governance are what we really need. It won't produce utopia but it sounds great to me. Bring on the “woke!”

Actually his rant was against “environmental, social and governance (ESG) investments.” As usually he has the facts wrong. Socially responsible investment funds make money for investors while not investing in companies that do bad things like pollute, manufacture weapons or treat people badly. The truth is these funds have been around a long time and have a track record of performing as well, or better than, other investments that take no notice of the bad behavior of companies. So ESG is not a problem and it in not wrecking the American Dream.

But Tom's, and other Republican's, version of “freedom” doesn't extend to the freedom to do good. Only greed is good. So the Republicans in Congress are pushing legislation to prohibit these funds as an option for federal employees.

Welcome to Wisghanistan

God is Great! There is only one god and Dan Kelly is his prophet (and self-appointed lawyer).

Dan Kelly is the right wing religious nut running for the Wisconsin Supreme Court. He got his law degree from Regent University Law School (founded by televangelist Pat Robertson).

Taliban Dan believes our rights come from God and not the people or our government. He believes God's law (meaning the Bible as interpreted by him) takes precedence over human made law. I am not making this up. He has written about this in the past. Taliban Dan claims he will only rule based on the law and the Wisconsin Constitution. He would never rule based on his personal religious beliefs. He apparently is not human like those liberal judges.

My Bible says “by the fruits of the spirit you will know them” (the true Christians). But the “fruit” I see in Dan Kelly's background is rotten leftovers of a partisan, political hack with almost no experience as a judge and no qualifications worthy of a Supreme Court Justice.

So if you want to live in a theocracy like Afghanistan vote for Taliban Dan. Don't worry ladies. You will be able to choose the color of your burkas (as long as it is black).

Barbie Goes to Madison

Superior has a new state Assembly representative thanks to the gerrymandering of the 73rd district. Rep Angie Sapik has no political experience and no substantive qualifications for the job. She does have a smiley, pretty face, and apparently a talent for self-promotion. Facebook and Twitter are her areas of expertise.

Her Facebook page has a picture that says it all. It shows Angie with Tom Tiffany and the other two recently elected Republican legislators from NW Wisconsin. They are described as a “team.” I think the “four stooges” would more accurate.

In a science based world, lawmakers should have a minimal understanding of law, science, economics, finance and history to make intelligent decisions about complex issues. Politicians lacking in knowledge and experience become pawns of “advisers” like lobbyists, special interests and big money donors. The result is bad public policy that benefits the few at the expense of the rest of us.  

Given Angie's complete lack of all knowledge and qualifications she can be nothing but a stooge for the power brokers. “Barbie Goes to Madison” could be the theme of a fluff “B” movie. But Angie's empty, airhead, cheer leader personality is unlikely to effectively represent us in the Assembly.